Mindful parenting: A path to deeper parent-child connections
“There is no such thing as a perfect parent, so just be a real one.” - Sue Atkins
Parenting is undoubtedly one of the most challenging, yet rewarding things in life. It’s a tumultuous journey from day one, filled with plenty of emotions across the spectrum - happiness, excitement, anger, sadness, and many more. Likewise, a parent-child relationship is a complex dynamic influenced by various factors, and nurturing a strong bond with your child requires dedication and mindfulness.
In recent years, there has been a significant amount of light shone on the approach of mindful parenting for its potential to enhance parent-child relationships. In this article, let us delve into the world of mindful parenting, its principles, and how it can help strengthen the bond between you and your child.
Well, what’s mindful parenting?
It’s an approach to raising your child that places emphasis on being present in the moment, non-judgmental awareness, and cultivating a deep connection with your child. It draws inspiration from mindfulness meditation, which is rooted in Buddhist traditions and focuses on staying fully aware and attentive to the present moment. When applied to parenting, mindfulness involves being fully engaged in the experience of raising a child, without being distracted by worries about the past or anxieties about the future.
Principles of mindful parenting
1. Presence
One of the fundamental principles of mindful parenting is being fully present with your child. We all know how easy it is to get distracted by a funny video on your phone, or to be tempted to watch another episode of your favourite show on Netflix. When you’re spending time with your child, make a conscious effort to put aside such distractions that may divert your attention. Your presence involves active listening, observing, and engaging with your child on a deeper level, and you know that it’ll be fully appreciated at the end of the day!
2. Non-judgemental awareness
To be a mindful parent, try practising non-judgemental awareness, which simply means acknowledging your child's feelings and experiences without criticism or judgement. It involves accepting your child for who they are, letting go of preconceived notions, and refraining from labelling their emotions or behaviours as good or bad. Seek to be objective, understand why they feel the way they feel, and see how you can go about making them feel better about themselves.
3. Emotional regulation
The theory of mindful parenting encourages parents to manage their emotions effectively. If you can regulate your own emotions, you are better equipped to support your child in handling their own emotional challenges when it arises. This principle also promotes modelling healthy emotional expression.
4. Empathy and compassion
Mindful parenting emphasises empathy and compassion toward your child's feelings and needs. When you approach your child's struggles with empathy and compassion, you create a safe and nurturing environment where your child feels understood and supported.
5. Mindful discipline
Mindful discipline involves responding to challenging behaviours with calmness and intention, rather than reacting impulsively with anger or frustration. This approach allows you to teach valuable lessons while maintaining a strong emotional connection with your child.
For instance, if they did something they weren’t supposed to do, give them a chance to do the right thing by explaining the consequences of their bad behaviour. An example would be if they scribbled on the wall - tell them to stop or else you’ll end their playtime immediately. This provides your child with a clear warning and gives them an opportunity to alter their behaviour.
How mindful parenting strengthens parent-child relationships
1. Enhanced communication
It fosters open and effective communication between you and your child. When you actively listen and engage with your child, it creates a safe space for them to express themselves more freely. This, in turn, helps you understand your child’s thoughts, feelings, and concerns better.
2. Trust and security
It builds trust and a sense of security in the relationship between you and your child. When children feel heard, respected, and loved unconditionally, they are more likely to develop a strong bond with their parents. This trust becomes the foundation for a healthy relationship that can withstand challenges!
3. Emotional resilience
It equips children with emotional resilience. By teaching them how to identify and manage their emotions, you empower your child to navigate life's ups and downs with confidence. This skill becomes invaluable as they grow and face more complex emotional challenges in their lives, be it in academic, professional, or personal aspects.
4. Reduced conflict
It can lead to a reduction in conflict between you and your child. When parents approach discipline with understanding and empathy as aforementioned, children are less likely to rebel or engage in power struggles. Instead, they are more inclined to cooperate and learn from their mistakes.
5. Improved parental well-being
Not only is mindful parenting beneficial for children, it is also beneficial for parents! Practising mindfulness can reduce parental stress, anxiety, and overwhelming feelings. When you are calmer and more centred, you can be more emotionally available and responsive to your child's needs.
In a nutshell
Mindful parenting is a powerful approach that has the potential to transform parent-child relationships for the better! By cultivating presence, empathy, and compassion, you are creating a nurturing environment that promotes trust, emotional resilience, and open communication. While mindful parenting may require effort and practice, the rewards are immeasurable - a deeper, more meaningful connection with your child.
Find out how you can further improve your relationship with your child by understanding their preferred way of communication, their love languages, and more with Emotional Intelligence Coach, Rasathi, in our latest Ask Our Experts series.